


these foolish things...

by faemalenomad



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom
Genre: AU of an AU, Do-Over, Duplicity, F/M, First War, Horcrux Speedrun, Jazz - Freeform, Order of the Phoenix - Freeform, Ruthless, Spying, Veracity, amoral, fem!snape, music references, polyamorous
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:41:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26026639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faemalenomad/pseuds/faemalenomad
Summary: Companion piece to VeracityJames Potter finds himself twenty five years in the past, and find soon enough he isn’t alone. With the help of his partner and current nemesis, Severa Snape, can they right the wrongs of the past? And will they be willing to sacrifice everything in the process- including their own souls? For Lily, the answer is yes.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans, Severus Snape/James Potter, Severus Snape/Regulus Black
Comments: 11
Kudos: 80





	1. Oh How the Ghost of You Clings

**Author's Note:**

> This is an alternate story to my AU, Veracity. That was a what if, with a female Snape who married James Potter, while they married each other under false pretenses, they eventually fell in love and took down Voldemort. You don’t have to read the story, that’s all you need to know, though minor references to the story and character details might be referenced. This story is going to be more mature than Veracity, which was rated M for violence and themes on a sexual nature. However, this story will have more overt sexual content.
> 
> As always, I appreciate your feedback

* * *

_September 22, 2000_

  
James Potter steadied himself as he stood by the fireplace waiting for his wife. He checked his watch, she was running late.

He poured himself a glass of the rather nice Pinot Noir he’d bought and started without her, not that she’d particularly mind. Severa was never the romantic type, even after twenty-five years.

Twenty-five years. Where had the time gone?

It was a miracle, of course, that they had made it out of the war alive- barely at that, and destroyed the Horcruxes. Voldemort was dead and gone, and with the final shard released from Harry Prewett’s scar, he was nothing more than a memory.

It still haunted him though, thinking about how Lily had to die so horribly, while he and Severa were still alive. They might not have had the happiest marriage, but they had lived, and had two beautiful children together. Laura had gotten married, and Richard had moved out- leaving James alone with his thoughts most days since Severa spent so much time at Hogwarts.   
  


He hadn’t much time to reflect. With a flash, Severa stepped into the fireplace and looked contemptuously at the glass of wine in his hand. “Bit early to start isn’t it?” She sneered.  
  


James leaned in to kiss her, and Severa half-heartedly accepted it. “Happy anniversary to you to, Vera.”

“You too,” Severa mumbled back. She took the glass out of his hand and took a swig. “I think I’ll go mad having to teach those idiots. I’ve had the most terrible day.”

”Is it the Third Years this time?” James asked.

”No, my NEWT class of you can believe it- can’t even prepare a proper Elixir to Produce Euphoria. Got the proportions all wrong, and half the class was singing. It was disagreeable.” She took another sip. “This is quite good, actually.”

”I got it from that vineyard we visited a few years back in Côte d’Or.” James said. “Do you remember that charming little inn we stayed at?”

”I certainly remember the bedbugs,” Severa replied. “Shall we eat then? What have you in mind for this oh so special anniversary?”

”Nothing too grand, I thought I’d try my hand at Daube. But I did make those lavender thyme macarons you like.”

Severa gave him one of those maddening, indiscernible little smiles of hers that barely reached the edge of her thin lips. “You certainly spoil me. Oh, afterwards, I was given something to take a look at, I thought you might want to join me.”

After they had eaten, James cleared the table, floating the dishes to the sink. “So what is it you wanted to show me.”

Severa took out a large leather bound book from her work satchel - the one she usually carried to grade papers in, and placed it gently on the table. “Regulus said he found this in Knockturn, and wanted me to inspect it, see if it was genuine.”

”Did he purchase it legally?”

Severa waved off his question. “All minor details, the point is, after reading the runes- I think it’s more than some average grimoire or spellbook. I think...this might have to do with deep magic.”

James looked at the book with interest, but the runes looked indecipherable, the faded ink smudged on the vellum. “How can you tell? Also, shouldn’t this be dealt with by the Unspeakables?”

Severa scoffed. “And have them take it away? Well, there are some words that have been lost in translation, but here- that’s the Greek word Pneuma, which in this context means the soul. Soul magic is part of the deep magic, very old stuff that hasn’t been properly studied in eons.”

”For good reason,” James added. “Or have you forgotten about the Horcruxes?”

Severa scowled. “Of course I haven’t, but that’s not the only use for it. And it’s for purely academic purposes.”

”As fascinating as it is, why don’t you put that book away and let’s head to bed. I’ve missed you.”

Severa relented, closing the book and leaving it on the table. She followed him into the bedroom, where they made love for the first time in weeks. 

After they had finished, James held his wife in his arms, her thin frame pressed against his, as he nuzzled his face in her neck, her back facing him.

”James, are you...happy with how everything turned out?” Severa asked. 

  
He paused. “I think so. We built a good life together, didn’t we?”

”But, if you could do it all over again, choose differently, wouldn’t you? I know I wasn’t your first choice.”

”Well, if I had the chance, maybe. But as far as I’m concerned, it’s a moot point.”

Severa nodded. “Forget I said anything then, just some silly musings before bed.”

James yawned, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “Goodnight then.”

* * *

When James awoke, he was utterly alone.   
  


Perhaps Severa has woken up early again, as usual. Usually he could smell the coffee brewing in the kitchen. The air however, smelled different. Musty. The sheets felt different too. He opened his eyes to find himself in a four-postered bed, something he hadn’t used since his schooldays. Cautiously, he noticed it looked exactly like his old bed at Hogwarts. He was even in his own pajamas.

Nervously, he ran his hand through his hair and sat up. He grabbed the velvet curtain and opened it.   
  


Much to his horror he was in the Gryffindor boy’s dormitory. The sunlight was shining through the window as he could hear the sounds of the others- his friends- getting ready to start their day.

”About time you woke up, Sleepyhead.” Sirius shouted as he threw a pillow in his direction. “I thought I was going to have to douse you with water! We’re going to be late for class if you don’t hurry up soon.”

James blinked in disbelief. It certainly was Sirius standing in front of him, but he was just so...young.   
  


James rubbed his eyes. “I don’t know how you did it mate, but you had me fooled for a second. This is very good.”

Sirius stared at him in confusion. “What?”

”It’s clever, transporting me back to my old dorm, deaging yourself, you really had me going for a second. Who else is there? Remus?”

”Everything alright, Prongs?” Peter asked poking his head into the curtain.   
  


James gasped. He knew for certain this wasn’t a prank. Peter, the traitor, had died long ago and not even Sirius could have been able to resurrect him in his teenage state.

”He’s acting a bit odd.” Sirius commented.

”Should we take him to the Hospital Wing?” Remus asked, joining them. James has almost forgotten how young and carefree Remus was back in their schooldays. He certainly had less scars, and fewer grey hairs.

James shook his head. “No, I’m fine. I’ll be ready in five minutes.”

If he was going to get to the bottom of his strange predicament, he was going to have to play along.

As they navigated the stairs and passageways, James felt the memories of the past rushing back. Of course, he visited the castle frequently to see his wife, but it was different passing by classmates he knew were dead, or noticing little things about other students he hadn’t known well before, but got to know better in his job at the Ministry.   
  


It wasn’t until he sat down in Defense that he noticed her. He couldn’t have missed that fiery red hair anywhere. He felt breathless, seeing her alive, all flesh and blood and sinew as opposed to her marble statue at Godric’s Hollow.

”Lily.”   
  


James cringed. He hadn’t meant to say that aloud. She turned around.   
  


“What is it, Potter?” She asked irritably.

He coughed. “Nothing in particular. I just wanted to say you look very nice today.”

Lily gave him a withering glare, “Thank you,” she replied sarcastically. “I only do so for your gratification.” She turned to face her friend, ignoring him. James blushed, he really has made a fool of himself, but he hadn’t meant it like that. He felt Sirius plaice his hand sympathetically on his shoulder.   
  


After class, they headed for lunch. It was difficult navigating his new (old) body, all gangly limbs of different sizes, but he was getting used to it. He made sure to sit at the side of the table facing the other House tables, trying to scan for Severa. Even if she didn’t remember him anymore, he felt some comfort knowing she was there.

She was reading a book, it looked like one of her old beaten up texts. He couldn’t help but laugh, she looked so angular and scruffy. The years of comfortable living and a decent wardrobe had evened out her features when they were married, so it was jarring seeing her back to her old self in her twice mended, fading robes and stringy hair.   
  


He still wanted to kiss her.

”I see you’re keeping an eye on Scervix,” Sirius noticed, bursting James’s reverie. James remembered that nickname. He came up with it when he had found out that cervix was Latin for nape, and also he and Sirius had thought it was very clever comparing her to the rather unsavory aspects of her sex, since they weren’t allowed to call her other names for female genitalia. “What say you about ambushing her before our next class? Have a little fun?”

Honestly, he was very opposed to the idea, but at this point in time old James- the person he was supposed to be, would be delighted at the idea. “Let’s.”

They followed her. Severa was unusually distracted, walking slower than normal, her head buried in her book. She was making it too easy.

When they reached a quiet alcove, Sirius sent an _Immobillus_ her way, causing her to drop her book as she froze

They laughed, and ran over to her, undoing the spell as she came to. 

  
“What is the meaning of this?” Severa shouted irritably as Sirius grabbed her wand, lifting his arm high above her head.   
  


“Sorry, Scervix, you’re going to have to do better than that,” Sirius laughed. He signaled to James to jinx her. He sent a Jelly-Legs, but purposely missed. “If you want it back, you’re going to have to say ‘please,’” he said, taunting her.

”As if I’d beg to a curr like you,” she said, folding her arms.

”No need for such vicious language,” Sirius tutted, “A curr, indeed.” He smiled at the irony.   
  


Severa exchanged a look with James of exasperation, as if having to deal with a child. “Can you talk to him? This is getting tiresome.”

”Padfoot, give it back.” James asked. She wasn’t acting at all like the angry girl he remembered. Usually, she would have had more choice words for the both of them. Perhaps it would have come to blows or hexes.

“But we‘re just getting started,” Sirius pouted.

”We don’t really have time for this,” James reasoned. “We have to go to Potions in ten minutes anyway.”

Sirius sighed. “Since when were you so responsible?” He asked. “Fine. Here you go, Scervix- catch.” He threw her wand back at her, and she caught it in a swift motion, much to Sirius’s surprise. He ducked, expecting her to curse him in return, but she placed her wand back in her robes.

Severa gave a pointed stare to James. “I expect better of you next time,” she chided.

”I’m sorry,” he replied, and he meant it.   
  


He thought he might be seeing things, but there she was, giving him one of those maddening little smiles of hers. There was a knowing look in her eyes of some sort of comprehension, being in on the joke. “I’m sure you are. I’ll see you around, James.”

She called him James, not Potter. And the way she looked at him...she knew.

”Vera, wait!”   
  


He ran after her, jumping in front of her. 

“James, you’re making a scene.” 

“Do you know what’s going on? Why are we here. Don’t pretend you don’t know me,” he added when she was she was about to deny it.

Severa pursed her lips. “Not here,” she murmured, leaning close to him. “Your dear friend is still watching us. Meet me in the Room of Requirement, tonight after curfew. We’ll talk later.”

James nodded. “Right. I’ll see you then. Don’t hold out on me, Vera.”   
  


“Of course not.” She whispered in his ear. Suddenly, she leaned over and gave a quick peck on the cheek, imperceptible and unnoticeable before walking away.

”What was that?” Sirius asked as he caught up to him.

James shrugged. “No idea.”   
  



	2. And Still My Heart Has Wings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James finds out what’s going on

James made his way to the Room of Requirement, hoping he wasn’t too late. He couldn’t seem to shake off his friends, who wanted to stay up late and work on potential pranks. While he felt nostalgic watching Sirius goad Remus (and also try to work on the boy’s self esteem), he couldn’t wait for them to eventually close the lights and fall asleep. 

When he finally made his way to the Room, he wasn’t sure what he needed to say. All he could do as he paced was repeatedly beg _I need to see Vera._

The door appeared, small and nondescript. James furrowed his brows, hoping this would work as he turned the knob.

The room itself was covered wall to wall with piles of books, caldrons, discarded hats, robes, trunks. It was vast- expanding far beyond his field of vision.

“There you are!” Severa cried out.

She was searching inside one of the many cabinets. Evidently, she did not find what she wanted as she closed it in a huff.

“What’s going on, Vera? You promised you’d explain why we’ve ended up here.” James moved towards Severa, standing face to face with her as she rummaged through various curios.

Severa arched her brow. “How can you be so certain I’m the person you think I am? Or that I know your predicament?”

“The Severa who should belong in this time certainly wouldn’t be willing to meet me alone...especially if she knew what I wanted to do with her right now.” 

“Throttle me?” Severa asked in amusement.

“Close,” James grabbed her by the waist and kissed her directly on the mouth. Severa leaned in, her hands dropping to her side, then moving around his neck. Janes presses himself closer to her, until their foreheads touched. He sighed. “I’ve wanted to do that since we’ve arrived here.”

“You shouldn’t make a habit of it,” Severa mumbled, still clinging to him. “We can’t just start getting chummy out of nowhere, it’s too conspicuous.”

“So, it is you?”

Severa frowned. “Of course it is. Would you have still kissed me if I was actually sixteen?”

“No, but you keep being so bloody obfuscating. And you still didn’t explain anything as to why we’re here.”

Severa narrowed her eyes in annoyance. “I was getting to that before you interrupted me.” She took a deep breath and steadied herself. “I think I am partially to blame. I’m sorry you’re trapped in this mess with me.”

“What do you mean?” James asked, letting go. He sat down on one of the discarded ratty armchairs, while Vera leaned against a bookcase. 

“You and I haven’t been happy in a while, have we? There’s nothing left for us, we’ve been stagnating, especially with the children grown up. Our marriage was essentially a sham that we fooled ourselves into believing, but did we really live the lives we wanted?”

“Maybe it isn’t what we planned, but yes, I think so,” James protested. “So what did you do, Vera? Was it that...book you were meddling with? The one about soul magic? Did you think you could just get a do over because you were so disgusted with the life we built together?” James could feel the heat rising in his face. They had this discussion too many times already, he thought they had gotten past this point, that she really loved him.

“No, I didn’t mean it like that!” Severa shouted back. She turned away from him, staring into the distance. “I just...I just feel useless. Like I’m going through the motions in my life. The only time I actually had any purpose was during the war. If I could go back, change things just a little- I could end things earlier, for good this time.”

“You’re talking about Lily, aren’t you? You want to destroy the Horcruxes before the Prophecy?” James asked.

“Yes, and since I already know their whereabouts- and how to destroy them, I could in theory get it done before Harry is born. Lily will lead a normal life, and more importantly, she will be alive.”

James didn’t know what to say to that. Despite the years that had passed, the missed opportunities and their almost love, he did feel something for Lily too- buried deep inside himself. No matter how many romantic gestures he performed for his wife (or mostly for his own satisfaction), or the happiness he felt for his children, he too felt that gnawing sense of guilt. For everything he and Severa did, they still failed her.

“Vera, this is insane.” James declared, though he wasn’t so sure himself.

“I’m truly sorry, James. I didn’t expect you to follow me here. I can try to find a way to send you back, though I would have appreciated your help.”

“I didn’t say I wouldn’t help you, Vera.” James replied. He looked at her, their eyes locked on each other as James stared into her brown inscrutable irises. He stood up. “Whether I like it or not, we’re in this together. And I’m following you, wherever this journey takes us.”

Severa’s mouth opened as she breathed in heavily. “I can’t ask that of you. Not again.”

“You aren’t asking me,” James noted, “I’m volunteering. Besides, I know too much. For all I know, you don’t know how to ‘send me back,’ and you’ll find it easier to place me in a shallow grave.”

Severa laughed in surprise. “You think so little of me?”

“No, but I know to be wary of you when you’re manic. And even though you could do this on your own, you definitely could use my expertise.”

Severa shook her head, wiping her face. “You’re throwing away your second chance...for me? You do understand that you can do anything this time around, get a different career, a different girlfriend - maybe even try to work things out with Lily.”

“You wouldn’t be jealous?” James asked curiously.

“Maybe, the irrational part of my brain might be. Personally, I think she’s too good for you, but I won’t stop you.” Severa replied earnestly.

James wouldn’t want to test that. “Either way, it’s kind of silly to discuss those sorts of things. It’s not like I’d be able to be involved with anyone else at the moment. I’m far too old for anyone except you, and the same goes for you. We’re stuck with each other,” he teased.

Severa gasped, in what sounded like a laugh, or a sob. She adjusted her robes and composed herself. “Very well then, we best get started. I called you here to help me find the diadem.”

“It’s... _here_?” James asked incredulously. 

“Yes, though I’m having a bloody difficult time trying to find it. I’ve forgotten where it was from last time. I’ve searched this area, you could help me with that section,” she said, pointing to the pile of knick knacks on her right. 

James rolled up his sleeves and got to work.

After an hour or so, he found a dull ugly tiara sticking out on top of a blackened bookcase next to a rather hideous marble bust. James lifted it above his head. “Found it!” 

Severa ran over to him. “Fantastic!” She was grinning despite herself. She grabbed it from his hand and placed it in her leather schoolbag.

“Do I get a reward for my efforts?” he asked cheekily.

“What do you expect, Potter? That I go down on you?” Severa asked coolly. 

“Well, if you’re suggesting it, I’m not opposed to the idea.” James replied, mussing his hair. 

Severa scoffed. “Maybe some other time. If you can find me Basilisk venom I’d certainly be happy to.”

James laughed. “You drive a hard bargain. Could we ask the room?”

Severa stood silent, evidently deep in thought. “We could try.” She closed her eyes tightly, and suddenly, a large, blindingly white fang clattered onto the floor, dissolving the thick Persian rug they were standing on. 

“Merlin, it worked.” James muttered. 

Wordlessly, Severa grabbed the fang at the root, placing the diadem on the floor. In one swift motion, she raised her hand above her head, plunging it into the diadem. As the jewel shattered, they heard the piercing wail of Voldemort’s soul as it flew out, dissipating into the air. 

They stood for a moment, waiting. When nothing else happened, they exhaled. 

“I think that counts per your conditions, don’t you?” James asked.

Severa rolled her eyes. “You didn’t do anything.”

James grinned. “Then why don’t I return the favor instead? You certainly deserve it.”

Severa’s eyes widened in surprise. “James!” 

“Is that a no, then?” He asked mischievously. 

Severa looked at him carefully. “Well, maybe just this once.”

He took her hand, and led her to a tufted divan (gods, how much furniture was abandoned in this room?) as she rested supine on its arm. He kissed her tenderly on her neck, his arms moving down her back as he gently massaged her, taking satisfaction in her sighs as she closed her eyes. As he undid the buttons to her robes, he kissed down her body, noticing little scrapes and cuts on her arms, burn marks on her wrist, little things he hadn’t seen before. Severa noticed. 

“Don’t look at me,” she said nervously. 

“It’s hard not too,” James countered. “Should I stop?”

“No. Do you really want to do this though?” Severa asked.

James kissed her. “Of course I do, I love you.”

Severa sighed. “No need for dramatics.” But she hadn’t sounded as sharp towards him.

He could tell though, that she had needed to hear that. He kissed down her torso, spreading her legs open, admiring her pale skin as he took pleasure in the sounds of her beautiful voice. 

He had wanted to take her then and there, but that could wait. They had time enough.  
  


After it was over, they held each other.

“We can’t get together this time around,” Severa declared. “Not if we want to maintain any cover.”

James wanted to argue, but she interrupted. “You know it makes sense. No one trusted us when we went public, it made things much too difficult. If I’m going to get the other Horcruxes, I’m going to have to gain the trust of the others, and that means staying the course.”

“What about you and Lily...are you two staying _friends?_ ” James asked.

Severa glared at him. “Sadly, no. It seems this world has some slight differences compared to our own, so it seems Lily and I never did have that moment where we were open about our feelings. And you and I never got together. It seems we still hate each other.”

“Strange.” James remarked. “So what are you going to do about her?”

“Do what most girls do at our age, let the friendship run its course. It’s not like she’ll notice,” Severa said bitterly. James thought it was a bit harsh, but also knew better than to disagree. Instead, he kissed her forehead and squeezed her hand. She squeezed it back.

“We are meeting again though, aren’t we?” James asked.

Severa turned to face him. “Of course. We still have so much to plan, contingencies to think of. Granted, we’re still a few years off from the next steps…”

“And those are?”

Severa rubbed her lips together. “I’m joining up again, of course. This time I’ll have to get into the Inner Circle faster, on my own merit. As for you...have you thought of joining the Order?”

“I was in the Order.”

“No, not with me as a spy. We can’t work for Dumbledore this time. We need to take control of our own lives, it’s not like he’ll believe us anyway- but he has his own motives that won’t align with ours. But you’re still on the Light side, if you join after school, he will trust you more.”

James has to admit, not fighting with his friends in the war had been one of his biggest regrets. “Alright, I’m in. Though this plan is completely mental.”

“I’ll be happy to listen to your suggestions if you have any. But we have time, plans can be altered,” Severa replied cryptically. 

James faces her, making sure to see her eyes. “As long as you keep me involved. We’re in this together.”

Severa looked at him in admiration. “Yes, we are.” She kissed him, and they spent the rest of the evening fooling around. It wasn’t until five in the morning they realized they should try to head back.

  
They snuck out of the Room of Requirement, hiding underneath the cloak as he escorted her back to the dungeons. Before she left for the Slytherin Common room, he kissed her goodbye. 

“Remember, we meet again next week,” Severa said. “Until then, try to act normal.”

“How can I when you make it so difficult?” James asked.

Severa shook her head. “Don’t make me regret this.”

James smiled. “I won’t.” 

He watched as she left into the portrait hole and walked back to the dormitory. The enormity of the situation slowly weighing on him like a pit in his stomach. This was real, and they were going to make some irreversible changes. 

He only hoped everyone else was prepared. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. A Cigarette That Bears a Lipstick’s Traces

Sneaking around wasn’t too difficult. With their past histories, getting out of bed and meeting after curfew was child’s play. Every few days, James and Severa would meet in the Room of Requirement to discuss their next move- what were their options, what were their backups. 

“We’re going to have to start making copies of the Cup and the Diary,” Severa said, writing it down on a chalkboard they had summoned in bullet points.

“I could start commissioning that,” James replied, folding his arms, leaning against the wall. “I’m sure we could get by on saying it’s for educational purposes.”

“And I could create the Diary replica, the less that we have out of our control, the better,” Severa added in agreement, writing it down. “I’ll keep them on me. If I’m near the vicinity of the Horcruxes, I’ll switch them out and destroy them.”

“We should destroy them together, if we can,” James declared. 

Severa nodded, the ghost of a smile approaching her lips. “Yes, I suppose we should. We are partners, after all. As for the Ring, we should probably retrieve it over exeuts, that’s the only time we’ll be out of adult supervision.”

James interrupted, “No, that wouldn’t work. Sirius is staying with me during the hols. I can’t just leave him alone, he’d notice.”

“Then we should opt for a time he will be too busy to notice you’re gone.” Severa countered. “How about before exams? It’s not like we’ll need to study for them anyway.”

“That could work...though before we change the subject, maybe you should consider trying to become an Animagus since you aren’t spending your time studying. It can be incredibly useful if you’re going to be in the field.”

Severa looked skeptical. “I’ve seen you get your antlers stuck in the door, I’ll forgo the embarrassment.”

James gave her an annoyed look. “You can laugh all you like, but it is useful, and it isn’t too difficult. I’ll be there if you need any help.”

“I wouldn’t.” Severa replied indignantly. 

“Then prove it. If you need any tips about how to hold onto the Mandrake leaf without anyone noticing, I have a few. You get used to the taste after a few days.”

“How do you speak with it?” Severa asked, curious.

“You don’t. We got by using sign language for most of the month. Though in your case you could get by not speaking to anyone.” James joked, Severa frowned.

“What if I need to talk to you?” She asked.

James thought for a moment. “We could enchant a pair of journals to communicate with each other, it wouldn’t be too difficult to modify the Protean Charm, you write in one, and I’ll respond in the other. That way we can communicate even after graduation. It should be able to send messages by text in real time”

“That is clever,” Severa said, mildly impressed.

“Am I not capable of cleverness?” James asked rhetorically. 

“Only occasionally,” Severa scoffed.

* * *

If they had time, they usually made time, they would end each session by fooling around.

One of these sessions certainly surprised them both. 

They had decided to have sex, they hadn’t really thought much of it until that point, but as they were going about business as usual, Severa grabbed onto his arm, gasping in pain.

“What is it?” James asked, stopping.

Severa shook her head, “It’s nothing. Keep going.” 

James looked at her suspiciously, and looked down, noticing the blood. “Oh Vera, I forgot. You’re a virgin.”

“It’s fine, I honestly forgot too. But I’ll get over it, it’s not too bad,” she dismissed.

“Are you sure?” He asked, uncertain. 

Severa ran her hands through his hair, grabbing a handful. “Yes, I’m sure. Now hurry up, we haven’t got all night,” she grinned, pulled his head back slightly, tilting it as she leaned in to kiss him. Eagerly, he continued, allowing her to take control.

It was strange though, losing ones virginity a second time.

When they finished, they talked about the possibility of getting back together after the war, if they survived.

“We’ll have to wait a few years, of course. But I don’t think anyone will mind as long as we keep a low profile.”

“Are you sure about that?” Severa asked. “And it’s not like we need to be public. I don’t really need that.”

James didn’t say anything to that, but he wasn’t sure he wanted to keep sneaking around like this even after they had accomplished everything. He’d like to settle down again sometime.

They dressed, and James escorted her back to the dungeons.

When he returned to the dorms, he was relieved to find the others were still fast asleep. Quietly, he slunk back into his bed, placing the cloak behind his pillow as he pretended to go to sleep.

“You were out awfully late, Prongs.” Sirius whispered, causing James to jump.

“Oh, I couldn’t sleep, just thought I’d go for a walk, clear my head,” he replied casually.

“Without me?” Sirius asked, evidently hurt by the idea.

“Didn’t want to wake you, you look so cute when you’re snoring like that,” James teased. He could hear Sirius huff, and knew he was probably upset at the idea of being called cute.

“Alright, but don’t make it a habit,” Sirius mumbled. 

“Go back to sleep, Padfoot.”

Sirius closed the curtains on his bed, giving a half-hearted goodnight. 

James felt terrible lying to his friends, but at this point it was too soon to tell them anything. Too much was hanging in the balance.

* * *

Being young again had its perks. He didn’t have any back pain, he had more energy, and his metabolism was great. He honestly didn’t remember eating so much the first time around, but he must have, right? He certainly needed it with all the Quidditch practice. He hadn’t played this much in years, had it always been this exhausting? Of course his hormones were all over the place. He couldn’t help but notice the girls around him, especially Lily, even though he’d mentally smack himself for it. They were younger than his own daughter for goodness sake! He certainly didn’t miss the acne, or those intense highs of teenage drama

Whoever said teenage boys were less emotional then their female counterparts was lying. James found as an adult, he was having to mediate between his friends when they’d have squabbles over who’s turn it was to use the shower, or who stole who’s lucky quill, or why someone had a certain chocolate frog card that really belonged to someone else. He hadn’t remembered these little events the first time around, perhaps he ignored them, or knowing him, made fun of the person complaining until they shut up. He hadn’t noticed before, but it was usually Peter having the most problems- Sirius tended to pick on him without even realizing it himself sometimes.

James took him to the side to have a word with him. “You need to lay off on Pete a little, he’s not going to say anything, but it hurts his feelings when you call him out like that.”

Sirius laughed. “Wormtail can handle it, he isn’t a baby. Besides, we’re just having a laugh. He knows I don’t mean it.”

“Still, just ease up a bit. He’s going through a hard time with his mum, we should be supportive.”

“I’m going through a hard time too, but we don’t really talk about that, do we?” Sirius said defensively.

“Then we should.”

Sirius’s eyes widened in surprise. “I didn’t mean…”

“No, really, how have you been feeling lately? I know things have been tough with your family…”

“They’re not my family anymore,” Sirius replied indignantly.

“I know,” James corrected, “But that doesn’t take away the hurt they’ve caused. And even though you had your problems with them, I’m sure you’re feeling a lot of things leaving them.”

Sirius nodded. They sat down on James’s bed. 

“I won’t deny it. Even though I hate my parents, it still hurts having them disown me. I thought for so long, maybe they’d come around. And then when that didn’t happen, maybe I’d stop caring, and I thought I did. And even if I hate them sometimes, I really do, sometimes I miss them? It’s stupid I know. But...you know the other day I passed by Reg and he just looked right through me. I really am dead to them.”

Sirius sniffed, and James pulled him in for a hug. “Oh, Padfoot. You’ve been so brave, and you shouldn’t have to hide those feelings, it’s completely valid. But you always have a family with us. And I’ve talked to my parents, they’re planning on formally adopting you, if you’d like.” 

It seems this James had already written to them, as he found from an owl post he received the other day, though he easily would have done so as well. One of the second chances he was certainly availing this time was writing to his parents, often, while he still had the chance. 

“You mean it?” Sirius asked, hopeful.

“Of course! Though you’ll have to become a Potter- you can still keep your name though.”

“I’d happily throw it away!” Sirius laughed. “Sirius Potter has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?”

“Not as good as mine, but fairly close,” James agreed. 

James never remembered talking to his friends about their feelings before, but as he conjured up a handkerchief to help Sirius wipe away the tears he was holding back, he wondered why not.

Remus, of course was another issue. 

With him, it was about suppression of course, but unlike Sirius who wore his emotions more readily, James had a hard time reading Remus. Most of the time, he carried on with an affable facade, blending into the background when they were joking around- joining in for that one line or devastatingly clever joke that really showed more of his personality than he let on. Even after all this time, it was difficult getting him to open up. All James could really do was be supportive when he could, especially during the week before the full moon.

James made sure to sneak in some of Remus’s favorite candy (chocolate covered hazelnut praline ladybirds) during their study break. And a few extra pain potions. Merlin knows he must be in constant pain now, he hoped wordless gestures were enough.

He hadn’t expected much in return, but he was surprised when after the full moon, Remus wanted to talk to him. 

“Why have you been so nice to me lately? Is something wrong?”

James blinked. “No, I just wanted to do something special for you.”

“You and the others already have done so much for me. I don’t want you doing too much, I’m already a burden on you as it is…”

“Remus, do you really feel that way? You have never been a burden. You’re the glue that keeps us together.”

“Because you lot feel like you have to take care of me. You don’t, I’m not an invalid!” Remus replied fiercely. James hadn’t realized his actions might have been seen more as pity than kindness, especially if he was acting out of character. He’d forgotten how Remus had abhorred the idea of being pitied, and Remus was probably in a heightened state of emotions as it was, with his hormonal changes from transformation.

“It’s not because of that. You are our conscious. You help us make the right choice, even if we don’t want to, because you’re a good person, and you help us try to be better in return. You think we’re taking care of you? You’re the one making sure we haven’t burnt the castle down!”

Remus snorted. “That’s true…”

James added placing his hand on Remus’s shoulder, “I didn’t mean to hurt you. You have never been a burden. But if you don’t like me getting you things, I’ll stop.”

Remus looked conflicted, shuffling his weight in his feet as he thought about it. “Well, you can keep giving me the chocolate ladybirds. I’ve never seen those before. Are they new at Honeydukes?”

James laughed. “No, I actually made them myself. Well, the House Elves helped- they don’t like anyone using the kitchen unsupervised. But if they let me make another batch, I’m certainly giving you more.”

“Since when could you make anything other than toast?” Remus asked in amusement. 

James wiggled his nose. “There’s a lot you don’t know about me.”

“Then I’ll certainly have to find out,” Remus teased back. 

* * *

The weeks passed, as they do, and they were heading closer to exams. James hadn’t really had much of a chance to meet Severa for a while, but he finally finished their journals and delivered hers personally on their last meeting. Since then, they hadn’t had a need to talk in person- they could just write to each other. He did miss her touch though.

Those glances stolen between classes would have to be enough. Though he couldn’t help but be a little jealous as he saw her talk animatedly with Mulciber and Rosier. They were leaning in on hushed tones, laughing quietly amongst themselves. If he didn’t know better, he would assume they were close friends.

 _I don’t know how you can stand to be so friendly with those duffers,_ James wrote in frustration.

There was a pause, before the ink rearranged itself in a reply. 

_Make no mistake, I hold no illusions about them anymore. They are merely a means to an end._ Severa replied. 

_But, they’re horrid. After everything they’ve done, how can you even speak to them?_ James replied.

 _It’s all another lifetime ago,_ Severa wrote back. _I will never forgive them, but I will not be blinded by my anger and let them see it. Their status holds no power over me anymore either, which I admit is hard to acknowledge, I honestly thought I was above those sorts of things at the time. As long as they keep underestimating me, I can keep using them._

There was another pause. _By the way, the Animagus potion will be ready soon. Do you want to be there when I transform?_

_Of course_

They met in the Room of Requirement- a much better place for brewing than James and his friends had used. Honestly, any place was better than Moaning Myrtle’s bathroom- but there were very few truly private places in the castle.

The potion was bubbling along nicely, it was the right color.

“Are you ready?” He asked as she took the required dose.

“I think so,” Severa replied evenly, closing her eyes as she took a deep breath. 

“Just let the feeling wash over you, you’ll know when it happens,” James advised.

Severa steadied herself, and in a whirl James saw her transform in a fluid motion - into a raven. 

She clapped her wings as she flew around the room, cawing. James laughed.

She transformed back in irritation.

“Of all the forms you’d take, I certainly didn’t expect that.” James remarked. 

“I suppose it could be useful for scouting purposes, but really this was a waste of my time.” Severa grumbled.

“I think you should be proud, very few people transform successfully, if at all.”

“Of course I would have succeeded. We knew that,” she muttered.

“Maybe we can fly together. You’re going to have to learn to like flying now, aren’t you?” James teased.

“Oh, shut up,” Severa mumbled.

“Hey Vera, why is a raven like a writing desk?” James asked. 

“There isn’t even an answer to that one,” she remarked. 

“Guess anyway?”

“Both have inky quills?” Severa asked.

“Good a reason as any!” James replied. “Personally, I would say it’s because both can be penned, but neither is ever approached without caws.”

Severa groaned. “That was awful.”

James grinned. “I try. Any luck on your end? I know you’ve been building up your connections with the Slytherins.”

“It’s going surprisingly well. Apparently, I could have been fairly popular this whole time, I just would have had to completely change my personality. Even the girls in my dormitory are beginning to speak to me, which is certainly a first. They’ve considered me a project, if you can believe it. I’ll let them do my makeup and fix my hair, it seems to be helpful in gaining their trust.”

“And are you alright with that?” James asked. He knew Severa hated having to do anything with her hair, or anything cosmetic for that matter.

Severa shrugged. “I don’t really care about my appearance too much, and it seems to be working. Evan Rosier and his sister invited me over to their house for the summer. He says he might even introduce me to Lucius, so that’s promising.”

“Just be careful,” James warned. “I’m not sure I’m comfortable with you being alone with them.”

Severa rolled her eyes. “I’ve been through worse. I’ll keep you updated on my progress.” She looked contemplatively at the floor. “How’s Lily? Have you spoken to her?”

“Barely, we exchange pleasantries at best. Though she’s probably relieved I haven’t been harassing her as of late,” James replied lightly. “But she seems a bit down, I haven’t seen her at mealtimes either.”

“If this time is anything like the last, her parents might have passed. I remember they died in a car crash around this term, Lily was living with her sister that last summer before school started our final year.” Her face soured. “She’s horrid, I don’t know how Lily never smothered her in her sleep.”

James frowned. “I never knew. Maybe you should talk to her.”

“She probably won’t listen to me,” Severa replied forlornly, “But, maybe you should. I’m sure she could use a friend.”

James nodded. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

* * *

He knew better, of course, then to just walk up to her and ask about her dead parents. But how was he going to approach her? The correct answer would probably be not to- but, he did understand what she was going through. He went through it (will go through it?) after he graduated. And it was devastating losing ones parents as an adult, James couldn’t even imagine what it must be like while at school. He briefly asked Marlene during Quidditch practice if it was true. Marlene to her credit, didn’t look disturbed at the question.

“Why do you want to know?” She asked sharply as they were placing the bludgers back in the trunk. 

“I heard about it through a friend, but I just wanted to make sure it’s true before putting my foot in my mouth about condolences,” James replied honestly.

Marlene seemed surprised. “That’s...oddly mature of you. A friend, you said? Was it Sirius? I didn’t think anyone knew about this other than Mary and I.”

“No, just...someone I know. But is it true?” James asked as he bolted shut the chest, lifting one end as Marlene lifted the other. 

“I don’t know if I should be telling you,” she answered, looking back at him as they carried the chest, “it’s a private matter, but yes. Lily’s parents have passed. It was from something called an automobile accident. She’s been putting up a brave face, but I know she’s been devastated. It’s taken everything out of us to make sure she gets out of bed these days.” Marlene paused. “Don’t you dare try to spread that around.”

James nodded in understanding. “Thanks, Marley. And don’t worry, it’s just between us.”

They walked towards the shed, placing the chest back on its shelf before heading back to the castle.

“I just worry about her,” Marlene said. “It’s not like her to be so quiet. I have been trying to be a good friend, but sometimes, it’s just difficult to see her like this- she always cheers me up, but I feel so helpless when she needs me.”

“Hey,” James comforted, “You are doing your best, and I’m sure Lily understands that. You just need to be there for her, and that’s enough.”

Marlene sniffed, moving the hair back from her face. “Thanks, Potter. I’ll...let her know you’ve been thinking about her.”

James frowned. “I’d rather you didn’t. I don’t want her getting the wrong idea.”

“About what? You seem to genuinely care about her wellbeing, it’s not like you’re using it to gain her sympathy, are you?”

“Of course not!” James replied indignantly. 

Marlene nodded. “I thought as much. You might be a berk, but you don’t hide your feelings.” She grinned. “Maybe I should tell her you do care.”

“That’s just cruel,” James replied jokingly. “Have you considered how I would feel?”

“No, but I’ll race you back to the tower. If I lose, maybe I’ll reconsider.”

Luckily, James was a good sprinter.

He hadn’t worried too much about this exchange, Marlene never really mentioned it again.

It wast until another one of his sleepless nights that maybe it had meant something.

He was walking up to the roof of Gryffindor tower. Technically, it was off-limits. Far too old and structurally unsound for anyone to be on top of- but there was a window, and a rope ladder one could attach to the spire, and with James’s agile reflexes, he could easily shimmy up there and have the most beautiful view of the Forbidden Forrest and the castle grounds. He’d only told Sirius about it, and sometimes the two of them would sneak up there to talk, but mostly James enjoyed being up there so he could truly be alone. Not that he didn’t mind the constant company, but being back in his old body was just overwhelming sometimes.

When he pulled himself onto the shingles, he smelled smoke. A faint ember flickered in front of him as his eyes adjusted to the figure of someone wrapped in their cloak, thick wavy hair blowing in the breeze. He inhaled the smell of the cigarette wafting in front of him and sat down next to the person lost in their thoughts.

“I didn’t know anyone else knew about this place.” James remarked casually, causing Lily to startle. He grabbed her arm gently. “Careful, it’s a long way down and Skelegro isn’t a fun experience- trust me.”

“Well, it’s not that secret, is it?” Lily responded, taking another drag. She removed her arm from his grip. “It’s not like you own it.”

“No,” James agreed. “But I wouldn’t expect you to break as many rules as you are right now to be up here. And what is this, you’re smoking?” James tutted. “Most unbecoming conduct for a prefect, don't you think?”

Lily frowned. “Since when did you care?” She looked out at the grounds. “Maybe I don’t care either. What was it all for, anyway? Working this hard, giving up everything for these accolades, my reputation, what does it even matter?”

“It’s important to you, that’s why it matters,” James replied. “You shouldn’t throw that away.” He took the cigarette from her fingertips and took a drag. He coughed, then extinguished it, keeping the butt in his pocket.

“I put everything into this world, into being the perfect witch. Learn as many spells as I could, work twice as hard as the others, because I have to. But in the end...I couldn’t in the end do anything to save my mum and dad.” Lily slumped her head into her knees and sobbed. James sat by her, placing his hand on her shoulder as he watched.

“There’s nothing you could have done. It is not your fault.” 

“But it is. I could have visited more, or I could have made their car safer- maybe found a way to strap them in so they wouldn’t have been thrown out of it- or, or anything really.” Lily wiped her face, her eyes red and puffy. “I could have stopped it, but I didn’t.”

“You didn’t know. You’re not omniscient, magic or not. And your parents wouldn’t have wanted you to feel guilty about it.”

“How would you know what they would have wanted?” Lily asked defensively.

“You’re right. I don’t know. But, it’s not healthy for you to keep thinking about what you could have done. There will always be something you regret, and there will always be this feeling of loss. It’s a part of you now, but it isn’t all of you. You are still that smart, funny and talented girl I know. And they’re not really gone. They will always be with you.”

Lily sniffed. “Yes, we Muggles believe in that, the eternal salvation of the afterlife, wherever that is,” she added snidely. 

“If going to a school full of ghosts has proven anything, it’s that it is true, on some level.” James argued.

“But is it true for Muggles though? Professor Binns said only witches and wizards have the type of power to project their souls. Muggles just, disappear.” Lily replied sadly.

James snorted in derision. “Like he knows anything. And that doesn’t prove they still can’t watch over you, they just can’t be ghosts. And maybe that’s for the better.”

Lily paused contemplatively. “Do you really think so?”

“Well, there’s really only one way to know for sure- finding the Resurrection Stone and just asking them.” James replied as he leaned back, lying down on the roof.

“The what?” Lily blinked in confusion.

“Oh. It’s a fairytale we wizards tell, called the Three Brothers. It’s stupid.” James dismissed.

Lily leaned back, turning to face him. “Tell me more about it.”

James hadn’t thought opening up to Lily would be so easy, or so normal. Honestly, he hadn’t thought he would be friends with her this time around, but here they were, talking to each other, sending notes, discussing homework - as if they’d always been.

Of course, he wasn’t asking her out anymore. That probably made a difference.

Lily had begun to notice too - she even teased him about it.

“It’s been a few weeks since you asked me out, Potter.” She was grinning slyly as she was scratching her quill to parchment, writing some addendum to her essay.

She was mocking him, but he didn’t mind. Compared to Severa she was positively playful. 

“Oh? I thought you’d be relieved.” He replied casually.

“Well, I am. Also, a bit concerned. I thought you might be trying to con me, but you don’t seem capable of it.”

James chuckled. “Con you? Do you have anything worth stealing?”

“No, hardly. But, if this isn’t a charade and you are truly over your lecherous behavior…”

“I’d hardly call it lecherous.”

“Undesired, then. Have you really turned a new leaf? Or are you off harassing some other poor girl?” Lily asked, though she sounded a bit less playful.

“Of course not, you have my word for it. Besides, it’s not like I’m starved for company.” 

“So there is someone then?” Lily asked, curious.

“My, aren’t we nosy?” James teased.

Lily did have the courtesy to blush.

“No, there’s no one, I’m just working on myself these days.” James replied. It would honestly be too complicated to go into the details anyway.

“Well, it certainly shows,” Lily replied with approval. “You really have changed, James.”

James felt anxious, wondering how much he’d let slip by letting his guard down. “Hopefully not too much. I’m nothing without my rakish charm,” he laughed nervously. 

* * *

James and Severa were meeting less and less in person as there was little to move the plan forward but to wait. At this point they were living parallel lives. 

The only way to see her, it seems, was to go through the motions of his old life and retread it’s mistakes.

“It’s been ages since we planned a prank,” Sirius declared. “We should think of something.”

“Do you want to try something big?” Remus suggested. “I was thinking we could change the gravity in the Courtyard- make anyone who enters it start bouncing uncontrollably.”

“Ambitious,” Sirius remarked approvingly, “but a bit too ambitious. Do we have time for that?”

“Well...no. Probably not with exams coming up,” Remus conceded. 

“Fill the Prefects’ bath with jelly?” Peter suggested.

“No thank you,” Remus interrupted. “It’s hardly fun if I’m also a target.”

“I disagree,” Peter laughed. Remus shoved him. Peter yelped and hit him back while Sirius laughed. 

“Hey! Cool it,” James said, breaking them up. “How about something uncomplicated - maybe we can jinx Scervix and get a rise out of her?” 

Honestly, he was more comfortable targeting Severa as opposed to any of the other students who were minors- she could handle anything they thought of. 

“Great idea, Prongs! We’ll get her after lunch.”

They found her sitting underneath a tree by the lake, skimming through her Potions textbook and eating an apple. Knowing her, she was probably looking over the notes of a new spell she was working on. 

“Oi, Scervix! What’s a charming young lady such as yourself doing out here by yourself? Those stooges lose interest in you already?” James shouted in her direction.

Severa glared at him, peering over her book. “Potter. I should have expected you. Exhausted your options in terrorizing the underclassmen?”

“Can’t I just ask about your wellbeing? You look especially sallow this afternoon. I’m delighted to see you taking an interest in getting more sun. It really brings out the greasiness of your hair.” James grinned, folding his arms to his chest as he leaned over her. 

He could hear the boys laughing in the distance.

“And I see your parade of dunces has followed you. Charming.” Severa sneered. She placed her book on the ground and stood up, wand at hand. “Let’s get this over with shall we?”

And so they fought, with a bit too much intensity than it merited between two teenagers. Their reflexes they gained from the war making their close shots a little too close. Severa’s hexes a bit too close to experimental Dark magic, James’s jinxes veering a little too close to the dangerous levels of Transfiguration. All easily dodged. He jumped, rolled over and bounded away, making sure to keep a fat distance from the others, who were transfixed for now. He felt exhilarated, able to go on for hours. That is, until he felt a shot at his ankles as his body was lifted off the ground, arms dangling in the air as his robes fell over his head. All that, and he got caught by damn _Levicorpus_.

“Had enough, Potter? Or are you eager for more humiliation?” Severa taunted. 

“Hardly. Once I get out of this, we’re going again. I’m not so easily bested.” James shouted back, muffled by his robes. 

“Is that so? I didn’t think you were one for that kind of stamina. Must be a blow to your manhood.”

“Vera, there are children present,” James reminded.

Severa leaned over, murmuring into his ear. The sensation of the fabric of his robes rustling against the outer edge of his ear, coupled with the feeling of her voice on the other side made him shiver. “They can’t hear us, not from over there, but they’re catching up so we better hurry.” She ran his wand over his bare chest, the hairs running down his torso standing on edge. “I could do so much worse to you, but I don’t think you’d want that. So, are you finished with this game?”

“Yes.” James gulped. He felt a chill down his spine and pressure forming in his groin that almost matched the pounding in his head. He hoped he wasn’t turned on. It was freezing outside but he felt flushed. 

He felt the thud as he fell to the ground, landing on a crumple on the snow. She helped him back up, leaning forward. “Meet me Sunday night before the end of term by the Willow. We’ll sneak into town and apparate from there.”

James nodded, wanting to say something, anything, until the others came running over, wands out. Severa put hers down, looking supercilious. 

“Let’s not fight anymore, you can have him back, I’m finished with him.” Severa shouted. 

“You won’t get away with this Scervix,” Sirius growled. “We’ll report you for that spell.”

“You won’t. I will say it was in self-defense. And who would look worse? The girl caught up against four aggressive young men? Or the aggressors themselves? If I wanted to launch a formal complaint, I could have all of you expelled. And where would that leave you without your family money to get by?” Severa grimaced.

Sirius looked ready to say something back, but James interrupted. “She has a point, mate. Let’s go.”

He dragged Sirius away, and the others followed. “This isn’t over, Scervix!” Sirius shouted.

Not much of a tactical retreat, but it would have to do.

Sirius took the incident more of a personal insult than James did. Over the next few days, he thought of various ways they could have their revenge. Most of which James shot down for some reason or the other.

“Where’s your sense of adventure, Prongs? It’s almost like you don’t know how to have fun anymore.” Sirius pouted. 

“I do, but maybe we do need to grow up a little, you do have to admit, some of these suggestions have been a bit childish.” James responded.

“So, we have to go bigger then. Something to really top all our other ones.” Sirius said, inspiration flashing in his eyes.

“That’s not what I meant at all,” James replied. Sirius nodded, but it seemed he wasn’t really listening. 

He hadn’t thought much about it until the end of the month. It was the day of the full moon, and James had his usual feelings of excitement and anticipation beforehand. It had been years since the four of them had transformed together, and he had enjoyed each moon immensely, even though it was selfish for him to admit it. The rush of transforming, of distracting Remus, and interacting with his friends- there was something unique about the bond they shared. They could communicate, but only through body language. It created a singular sort of connection that could compare to nothing else. Even Remus was in sync with them as the wolf, or maybe James imagined it. 

He had been distracted until he felt someone grabbing his wrist and pulling him into an alcove. Instantly, James grabbed his wand, only for them to push his arm down gently. 

“Steady now, it’s just me,” Severa said in a low voice.

“Vera!” James gasped. He put his wand away and leaned over to kiss her. Severa accepted briefly, before pushing him away. 

“We don’t have time. I wanted to catch you in between classes since I know you’re the only one taking Runes. We’ll at least be alone for five minutes.”

“I can skive off,” James suggested.

“No, it would be too obvious. I’ve had a friendly little chat with Sirius. He’s told me a rather interesting item.”

“And that is?” James asked, eyebrow raised.

“I had been rather vocal about my suspicions about you in the past. If I’m so keen on finding out what you lot are hiding, perhaps I should visit the Shrieking Shack tonight and find out for myself,” Severa answered with more than a bit of bitterness. 

James frowned. “He wouldn’t do that.”

“But he did. Though I wonder if he’s too stupid to understand what he did.”

“Are you going to go?” James asked.

“No, of course not.” Severa scoffed.

James thought for a moment. “Maybe you should. I think Sirius needs a taste of his own medicine...”

That night, James waited in anticipation. He could tell Sirius was also waiting, his leg shaking as they sat in the library before curfew. Remus had already made his way to the Shack, and Severa would follow shortly. 

“I suppose we should head out early, don’t you think?” James asked quietly.

Peter agreed, and Sirius grinned. “I hadn’t told you yet, Prongs, but we might have a visitor tonight.”

“Oh?” James asked, feigning curiosity.

“I told Scervix to take a look at the Shack if she was so hellbent on catching us. She is going to be in for a fright,” Sirius snickered. He waited for James to laugh with him, but found no support. Peter sat there, wide-eyed and silent.

“What! When was this? Do you think she’s already there?” James asked. He took out the Map, and they checked. Sure enough, her name was there, ad so was Remus’s. James swore, stuffing his things in his bag. 

“We have to hurry, we don’t have much time.” 

“She’ll be fine, Remus doesn’t transform for another fifteen minutes. Let her sweat it out.”

“Padfoot, you can just be so infuriating sometimes.” James said in irritation, before rushing out the door.

“Infuriating?” Sirius fumed. “What’s gotten into him?”

“I don't know, but he’s got a point,” Peter replied. We better get over there. Prongs won’t be able to handle him on his own.”

Sirius and Peter ran to the Willow, and down into the tunnel, opening the trapdoor and transforming. To their surprise, Scervix wasn’t there- instead, there was a torn set of school robes covered in blood.

Prongs wasn’t there either. 

They played with Moony, chasing and charging against him until they saw Prongs emerge from the tunnel. The stag looked like it had been covered in dirt. It charged and fought with Moony- more aggressive then the usual prancing. The wolf snarled, scratching and howling. 

The night was long, and Padfoot and Wormtail had to avoid getting injured tonight either from the claws or the antlers.

As the early rays of dawn peered into the grimy window, Moony slowed down, his howls turning to whimpers as he promptly curled into a ball and fell asleep. The fur slowly shedding as his spine cracked and retreated back into his body, his snout forming back into a nose. 

Weary, the boys transformed back into their human forms. 

“What happened to Scervix?” Peter asked, panting.

James looked gravely at them. “I don’t know how to say this, but I’m going to have to ask you both to keep a secret.”

“Why?” Sirius asked.

“I found...Snape, but I found her too late. She was already bleeding out and there’s not much I could have done while transformed.”

Sirius gasped. “No. I didn’t mean…”

“I’ve taken care of it, but I doubt anyone’s going to go looking for her. Still, if any of the Professors or Dumbledore ask, don’t admit to anything. If anyone finds out the truth, they will put Remus down.” 

“They can’t do that, can they?” Sirius asked. “I’m the one who told her to go there. I’ll take the blame. What would they do anyway?”

James frowned. “Well, it depends. What you did was manslaughter, but you’re still a minor so that might work in your favor. Though you could easily go to Azkaban too. But no ones going to know, because this stays between us. Got it?”

Peter nodded. Sirius looked thoughtfully.

“I...I don’t know if I can do this. We have to tell Dumbledore, maybe he can help,” Sirius bargained.

“No, Padfoot. We have to do this. You can tell Remus if you’d like, but we can’t tell anyone else.” James insisted.

Sirius started breathing heavily, folding himself into a ball. 

They waited silently for Remus to wake up, then helped carry him back to the hospital wing. They skipped breakfast and headed straight to History of Magic. James watched as Sirius was lost in thought, focusing on the specter in front of him droning on. 

At lunch, Sirius was still silent, barely touching his food. Even Peter looked anxious. Sirius kept looking at the Head table, and then down at his plate. 

James wondered if he was being too harsh, but hopefully Sirius would forgive him.

“I should tell them.” Sirius insisted. 

“You don’t have to,” James urged. “You’ve done nothing wrong.”

Sirius did not look convinced, fiddling with the hem of his robes.

When they arrived at Potions, Severa was sitting at her usual place, unharmed. Sirius dropped his books.

“Snape! How…” Sirius exclaimed in shock. He turned to James, “You told me…”

“Is something wrong, Black?” Severa asked, trying to hide her amusement.

“How is she here?” Sirius hissed. “You lied to me!”

“I did,” James confirmed. Peter let out a nervous giggle.

“This isn’t funny!” Sirius shouted. Peter stopped.

“It isn’t,” James agreed. “But what you did wasn’t funny either, you know.” James looked at the other students staring at them. “We better sit down, class is going to start soon.”

Sirius wouldn’t speak to him for almost two weeks afterwards. James expected as much, though he hadn’t expected Remus taking his side when James told him his side of the story. He was anxious to know what happened, remembering that Severa was there, but blacking out before he found out what became of her. He didn’t appreciate being used as a prop for a prank at best, accessory to murder at worst. When pressed for the truth, James ended up telling them a fabricated story about helping Severa out of the Shack in the knick of time. 

“Of course, she owes me a Life Debt, but I don’t know how one goes about collecting on that.” James said casually.

“Maybe you could tell her to go off herself, make our lives a bit easier.” Sirius mumbled.

James ignored that. But he knew he was going to have to make it up to Sirius soon, especially since he had broken his trust. It would be difficult to rebuild it.

* * *

The night before exams, James waited outside, wrapping himself in his cloak. 

It felt like eternity before he heard the thud of Severa’s footsteps on the soil.

“Took you long enough,” James remarked.

“I got delayed, apologies.” Severa said. “Let’s go then, we’ll need to be back by dawn.”

They apparated from the Shack go Little Hangleton, landing in the outskirts by the remains of Riddle House. It was eerie and abandoned, with only the faint light of the groundskeeper’s house visible. 

Using the light of their wands, they crept down to the remains of the Gaunt house, looking for any traps. James noticed a few curse signatures, pointing them out to Severa. They moved out of the way, throwing a rock at the target as a black smoke wafted out from the door, turning into a large cobra as it tried to chase them away. James cast all the counterspells he could think of until he cast _Lumos Maxima._ The blast of light obliterated the smoke, as curses and hexes shot out the door. Severa and James danced around them, dodging out of the way, casting _Protego._

Severa hastily dismantled the wards, kicking open the door.

As they ran inside, vicious golems emerged from the dirt, fangs bared as they pounced. James fought them off, slicing them open as Severa found the ring. She gave the signal, and they ran out of the hovel, locking the door behind them. Severa tried to reinstate the wards, but as the golems kept banging at the door, there was only so much she could do.

She grabbed James’s hand, lifting her wand. “He’d have noticed anyway,” she said as she apparated them out.

They destroyed the ring when they returned to the Shack, Severa undid the curse, while James had the honor of plunging the Basilisk fang into the Stone and watching Voldemort’s soul scream and wither away.

“We better hold onto it this time,” James remarked, plucking the Stone out of the ring and keeping it in his pocket.

“It might be challenging having to explain to Dumbledore how we got it in the first place,” Severa smiled sardonically. “He’s lived without it this long, he can get closure later.”

James fiddled with his pockets, finding the old cigarette stub he shared with Lily. It still had the marks from her lipstick.

“It’s here, isn’t it?” Severa asked.

“Yes.”

“Can I have it?” she asked.

“I’m not sure why you’d want it, but of course.” James replied gently, handing it over as their fingers touched.

“For the same reason you’ve held onto it this long,” Severa mumbled. She brushed her hair out of her eyes, placing it in her pocket. 

“So, any plans after term?” James asked.

“Still visiting the Rosiers. I’ve made some progress. I am getting that audience with Lucius, and if all goes well I might get an invitation to join by Seventh year.”

“That’s ahead of schedule,” James replied.

“Two down, three more to go. If I can make myself useful to either Malfoy or the Lestranges, I can take on the other two myself- then it’s up to Regulus to deal with the locket.” Severa said hopefully.

“Aren’t you helping him?” 

“He’s been rather aloof. I can’t seem to get through to him this go around. Sadly, I think we won’t be able to save him.”

James sighed. “Pity.”

They made their goodbyes and snuck back into the castle. James gave her a passionate kiss, hoping to make up for the months he wouldn’t see her again.

“Write to me in the journal when you get to the Rosier Estate.” James said urgently.

Severa caressed his face. “I will. Don’t worry about me. You take care of yourself, James. Make sure Sirius doesn’t burn the house down.”

James smiled, holding back tears. “I will.”

* * *

When the term had ended, James and his friends celebrated by getting drunk. Normally, he would have discouraged this, but he figured they might as well try it out - act rebellious while they can. He’ll just keep an eye on them. 

They shared a bottle of Firewhiskey between the four of them. Each taking turns to see who could cough the biggest flame. 

Remus even came up with a drinking game involving the pack of tarot cards he had in his trunk. Lucky bastard had a fast metabolism, so he never really had a hangover no matter how much he drank.

“James, it’s your turn to draw,” Remus said, rather insistent they all kept playing until someone passed out. 

James was certainly grateful for having a young liver right about now. 

“Alright.” He picked up a card from the deck. 

“Three of Cups,” Remus remarked. 

“What does that mean?” James asked.

“Well, we’re not doing an actual reading, I was just going to ask you an embarrassing question,” Remus teased.

“Cups usually represent the water element- so emotions and such,” Peter interrupted.

“Someone’s been paying attention in Divination,” Sirius teased. “Any luck with that girl?”

“No,” replied Peter, dejected. “But I’m close, I can feel it. I just need to get up the courage to ask her next time we swap teacups.”

“Speaking of cups, does yours runneth over, Prongs? How goes things with Lilyflower?” Sirius asked. James threw his card at him, Sirius roared with laughter.

“There’s nothing to go on. Same as always,” James replied. 

“You two have been awfully close though,” Remus added.

“We’re just friends, and that’s probably all it will ever be,” Jamed insisted. “And honestly, I’m fine with that.”

Remus and Sirius exchange glances, unconvinced. 

“Well, my question is, is there any other girl in your life? Who are you going on those late night _walks_ with - we’ve noticed.”

James raised his eyebrows, he thought he was being clever, but perhaps he hadn’t been. “No comment.”

Remus shakily pouted the bottle into his glass, and the brown liquid sloshed out, singeing the floor. “You know the rules, drink up.”

James sighed and drowned the shot. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super Long chapter! Wanted to get the Hogwarts stuff out of the way


End file.
